may 1 2007 : fort lauderdale, florida, usa
Today we had the survey. I can’t tell you how strange it felt to go out in Bum without Ali on board. In the last four years this boat has never moved without both of us on her. The surveyor and buyer showed up at 7:30 and while they were inside the boat I slipped the lines and moved us out of our berth and up the river.

It was a pretty uneventful day as we motored along the river to the marina for the haul out portion. Our route took us right through downtown Fort Lauderdale and included a half dozen bridge openings. In all these years I don’t think I’ve had to use the VHF so much as I did in this one day as I called the bridge workers for openings and radioed ahead to warn other large ships ahead of us that we were coming their way as well. It can be a pretty tight squeeze in areas but I did enjoy cruising by all the nice homes and checking out all the boats tied up along the walls.

When we got to the marina I quickly lined up with the lift and started in. The lifts at this marina are designed for humongous boats so there are long runways into them, requiring a little extra skill to keep from smacking and scraping the boat the entire way. Just as we started moving in I noticed something wrong with the port engine. The tachometer suddenly dropped to zero and I couldn’t feel the engine responding at all, though I thought it was still running. It was hard to tell in the confusion and noise of the yard. Fortunately I was lined up well and slid right in without a hiccup. When the boat was lifted there was a huge plastic bag wrapped around the prop which had effectively killed that engine at the critical moment. That had the potential for a really ugly scene on survey day. I grabbed an allen wrench and quickly removed the prop and the bag. Actually it probably would have been an even bigger problem in the narrow waters of the river with nothing but million dollar boats on all sides. Maybe we could have used that insurance after all. And as a side note, the haul out cost $280 compared to the $175 four years earlier at the same place. The cost of the surveyor himself increased by the same percentage as well. It’s getting expensive to have a good look at a boat you are interested in.

The survey itself went pretty well. The engines checked out perfectly, even when I had to gun them full throttle for a minute for the RPM testing. Ali and I tend to baby our engines and I doubt they’ve ever been revved over 3000 RPMs, much less 3500, but it was smooth straight through. It always kind of amuses me the things that a surveyor deems important. Reverse polarity indicators, updated flares, up to code life jackets, the need to add another hose clamp to a water hose, etc. etc.. They end up with a list a mile long that a new buyer looks at once and then promptly forgets for all time. He pointed out a couple of other things which he thinks are worth a look, but nothing that seems too scary. No obvious deal breakers at this point, which is always a worry when somebody is inspecting every single inch of your boat. You never know what might turn up. Unfortunately the surveyor had to leave early for some other business and can’t finish until Thursday, leaving us in the lurch for at least two more days.

may 4 2007 : fort lauderdale
Yesterday we completed the boat survey. There really wasn’t much left other than to make sure a few more things were in working order. One of those was the stove. The surveyor asked me to fire up the four burners, and I flicked the gas switch and grabbed the lighter. I then fiddled around completely aimlessly with the switches, oblivious to how the stove actually worked. I’d seen Ali light it a thousand times, but had never paid very close attention, and I had never actually done it myself. So I played around with the knobs, getting nowhere, until the surveyor finally said, “Here, maybe I should get in there. Looks like I’ve got a bit more experience with these things.” He promptly lit all four burners.

Currently we’re on a mooring right across the ICW from the marina. It’s a nice quiet spot usually, but in the afternoon we heard a loud crashing noise come from the apartment building right across the street. I knew what it was right away because just a few minutes earlier I’d been watching some workers chiseling away at the brick while standing on one of those window washer type scaffolding things a few stories up. We both ran outside to see two guys hanging by ropes 100 feet off the ground and the scaffold swinging through the air and smashing through the power lines along the street. Within seconds there were sparks flying through the air and the transformer was exploding in great blue flames. It was quite the dramatic scene. The workers on the ground were yelling up to their buddies and it was quickly clear that everybody was okay.

We can’t believe the storms we’ve been experiencing here in Florida. A couple of nights back we got nailed at three a.m. with a huge thunderstorm that brought fifty knot winds and some wicked lightning. To say we are looking forward to living on land again and not giving a toss what the weather is doing would be an understatement. But being on a boat we spent the last two mornings staring outside at the rock wall fifty feet away trying to determine at what point our mooring ball would break loose, sending us smashing into it. Our mooring held, but sadly not everything on the boat came through the storm unscathed. It had dealt a death blow to the old gray man overboard pole. It had never saved a life, and according to many it never would have, but that gray pole did a great job hanging our flag.

We’ve been keeping busy lately by meeting with friends we’ve met through the website. Ali and I have really got to come up with a standard answer for, “So what’s your favorite place you’ve been?” At the moment we’ve got about six different countries and one major region listed as an answer. I’m sure everybody that asks us that question has gotten a different response depending on our mood at that particular moment.

So now the waiting game with the buyer begins. We’re hopeful that we can make a deal in the next few days and get on our way.

may 7 2007 : fort lauderdale
The other night we went to a Florida Marlins baseball game. While trying to think about what the last sporting event we had been to was, all we could come up with was elephant polo in Sri Lanka. But since they didn’t serve hot dogs or beer at that one we settled on Australian rugby instead. We had a good time at the game and only noticed three differences in the game since we left. One, you can no longer buy even a terrible upper deck outfield seat for under ten bucks. Even twenty dollars for that matter. Major League Baseball apparently thinks that while attendance falls they can simply raise the price of tickets to even things out again. Two, also related to cost, is that you no longer get a large tap beer for $5, instead you now get a puny 16 oz. plastic bottle of terrible Budweiser or Miller product for $7. An import with actual flavor runs ten. And lastly, most surprising of all to us, was that baseball now has cheerleaders. The Florida Mermaids now cheer on the Marlins in a desperate attempt to lure fat bald men down in to the expensive seats just behind the dugouts. All good family fun. We did get to see the Fish win the game with back to back home runs and as an added bonus we each received a decorative figurine of our new favorite Marlins pitcher, Don something or other.

This weekend in Fort Lauderdale they held the big Air and Sea show. Now we’ve never understood the draw of this event, watching planes fly around in circles, but we figured the boat provided us with a pretty good view of things so maybe we’d enjoy it. We didn’t. God is that a boring event. About once an hour a plane comes swooping in, dives straight down, turns straight back up, turns around and does that a couple of more times and then leaves. Wow. It’s about as exciting as watching a sports car do donuts in an empty parking lot. The only amazing thing we saw all weekend was actually what we didn’t see. That being a plane crash. We thought that every air show had at least one fiery crash. That’s why people go to these things isn’t it?

On the boat front we’re still waiting for the final word from the buyer. He has until five o’clock today to let us know if he accepts or rejects the deal we’ve made. At this point, if he rejects the deal, he may be killed. Not by me, but by Ali. The past couple of weeks have been more or less just killing time for us waiting for the boat sale to happen, and she is more than ready to move on, visit family, and head out on new adventures. Sitting around Florida is for retirees with nothing else to do, not for us.

later…

We have just been blown away. Our buyer just emailed to let us know that he is passing on our boat. That’s it. I know with absolute certainty that the boat is in the best shape it has been in since we bought her, I was there for the survey and didn’t see anything that I thought should be a problem. In fact, if we were still sailing there isn’t one thing I would do to her, not one. We’re just dumbfounded at the moment.

Anyway, the worst part for us isn’t that the deal fell through, it is that we have wasted so much time. We made this deal six months ago now, and essentially put all our eggs in one basket. It didn’t work out. And now that we’ve squandered another month here in Florida, we have to leave. Which all leads to one thing, the boat will be going to a broker after all. By this weekend she’ll be parked with one of the major brokerages here in Florida, and pictures of her will be all over the internet classified ads.

All right, Ali just ran out the door with duct tape, rope, and a knife. I should probably go stop her.

may 10 2007 : jacksonville, florida, usa
It’s been a busy couple of days for Ali and I. We called our friend Kent at Just Catamarans the next day and told him he had the boat listing. Trying to arrange all of the things necessary to sell a boat is not for us. It’s not as easy as selling a car, or even a house for that matter. There are just too many things to coordinate, especially for a couple with no phone. He said no problem and by that afternoon we had the boat tied up at one of their docks. That night he and his wife had us over for a going away braii, South Africa speak for barbeque.

The next morning Ali and I were up at six a.m. washing Bum for the last time, Ali on the inside and me on the out. Soon we were saying our goodbyes to her and by eight o’clock we were on the road pointed north. From Fort Lauderdale you head north to get south. Meaning that two hours later when we stopped for gas the people suddenly had themselves a thick southern drawl and everything but the traffic was moving slow as molasses. We had to stop every couple of hours because the Florida love bugs were at it and causing havoc on everyone’s windshield. We were tired and didn’t make it too far north before we pulled off at a Days Inn with a view of the parking lot and the interstate for the night.

This morning we were checking email and I was browsing the VW classified ads when I saw a brand new listing for a fully restored 1958 double door VW panelvan. It was pretty much exactly what we had been looking for. Everybody has been trying to warn us off of the old VWs and telling us to get a more roadworthy one from the 70’s or 80’s, or even an RV of some sort, but we’re gluttons for punishment so we emailed an offer. Five minutes later we got a great reply and a counteroffer. One more email and the deal was done. The restorers are a small Seattle company and it is perfect for us to pick it up when we go up to visit my mom in Portland next month. So we’re pretty stoked about that. The cargo area of the bus is totally bare and we’ll get to spend some time after the race this summer decking it out the way we want it for the big trip. Should be a fun project.

Later on, after we’d had time to think about what we’d done we just had to laugh. The parallels to our boat buying experience were pretty funny. The day we bought the boat was the first time either of us had ever stepped foot on a catamaran. The day we bought the VW we still had not ever stepped foot in a VW bus. The boat was white, clean, and roomy. The VW is white, clean, and because it is empty, appears roomy. And we had no experience in either vehicle yet we planned to take them around the world. Most people seem to think we should have our heads examined.

This afternoon we arrived at my dad’s place. He moved to Jacksonville a year or two ago now and we have never been here before so we’re sort of getting settled in for a few days. We’ve also got some good friends who live here, so between hanging out at the beach and visiting family and friends it should be a fun weekend.

may 14 2007 : peachtree city, georgia, usa
Why is it life in America is so much busier than everywhere else? It’s already been four days since we had a free moment to sit down and write about what we’ve been up to. We spent the last few nights staying with my dad and his wife in Jacksonville. We went out for steaks, drove down to St. Augustine (the oldest continuous European settlement in the States), went out for more steaks at a new Japanese steak joint, and on top of everything else they cooked a bunch of our favorite meals for us as well. Our lunner schedule has been thrown all out of whack.

St. Augustine was a cute touristy town full of old houses, good bars, and even a small fort. We wandered around the fort a bit and enjoyed the views out over the ICW.  When we were walking out Ali overheard a lady say, “I don’t see what the big deal is. It’s just a bunch of dark dungeony rooms.” It’s true, the place really could do with some skylights and windows. Maybe the Florida Historical Society should look in to that.

We also got to hang out with some cruiser friends who we had last seen in Turkey. They’ve somehow managed to get a job fixing up, and living in, a huge house just a block from one of the nicest beaches in Jacksonville. We always have fun talking to them because they have shared so many of the same experiences as us. And not so much relating to the actual sailing itself as to the often ridiculous thoughts we have about adjusting back to life on land. One of the things we found amusing was that we all seem so shocked by how close cars are when we’re driving down the road. We’re so used to vast spaces that when we’re flying along at 60 mph with another car just two feet away from us we suddenly feel like we are way too close. Even three-year-old Luna mentioned it while they were driving down the road. Seriously now, have they made the lanes smaller since we left or what?

Tonight we’re hanging out in Peachtree City with some friends we first met three years ago when they were working in George Town, Bahamas. It’s been fun seeing them again, as well as seeing their completely bizarre neighborhood. It’s a huge suburban community near Atlanta and is a strange mix of the movies The Truman Show and The Stepford Wives. The place is way too perfect. Everyone drives around in golf carts on special paths that go everywhere, including Walmart, the country club, and the bar. Each pond has just the right amount of ducks and geese swimming in it as well as at least three couples pushing strollers. Fortunately our friends realize just how ridiculously perfect the place is and they have a good time mocking it themselves. They’ve got the coolest golf cart in the entire town, painted with a big Bob Marley mural as well as a pumping sound system. We watched a little old lady walk down to the pond to feed the birds and we all joked that she actually came down every night to wind the mechanical ducks up.

may 15 2007 : henderson, kentucky, usa
We drove north today through Tennessee, the Volunteer State. Better known as the fireworks capital of the United States. Just as we entered Tennessee we heard an interview on the radio discussing a new visitors center that had just opened up on the state line and saying how it would be the first thing that people would see when entering their great state. But five miles in to the state the only thing we were looking at was a fireworks warehouse that would rival any Wal-Mart for the most square feet of shopping space in the state. We briefly considered picking up a pack of M-80’s to toss out our windows whenever a semi got a little too close to our bumper, but passed it up in the end.

may 17 2007 : st. paul, minnesota, usa
After a full 12 hours of driving yesterday we finally rolled on in to Minnesota (1900 miles from Fort Lauderdale) just after dark. The drive was pretty uneventful aside from a couple of pretty hard rainstorms along the way. We’ve really become weather babies over the last couple of years. Before sailing we would have given absolutely no thought whatsoever to the giant black cloud barreling towards us and darkening the sky at four in the afternoon. Now we actually take the nearest exit and wait it out, knowing it will blow through in five minutes. Seems sort of silly in a car, but we don’t care, it’s great not having to keep going when the nasty weather is closing in on you.

We got home late and found Ali’s parent’s house empty. We unloaded the truck, said hi to the nineteen-year-old cat that we left last time we were home never expecting to see again, and went to bed. Today we went right to work selling anything that isn’t going to be coming along with us in the VW. The three huge containers of books that we carried around on the boat for years probably aren’t going to find a home in the back of the bus.

may 18 2007 : st. paul
Today we finally got to work on our automobile issues. There are quite a few of them. First off was arranging insurance. Not quite as intensive as getting boat insurance, but still, for a couple of people who haven’t been insured in years and suddenly want to insure a couple of 40+ year old automobiles, it was a bit of a challenge. Fortunately we knew the right guy to call and we were hooked up pretty quickly.

We then headed to the DMV to renew our expired drivers licenses. No problem there, sixty bucks later we had new ones with both my motorcycle endorsement and both of our organ donations included. Tomorrow we’re going on a ride around the cities so it seemed the prudent thing to do. While we were there we also transferred the title of the Porsche into our names. The lady didn’t seem too pleased with the price of the car that was written on the title, but in the end agreed to let us pay the tax with the warning that we would probably be contacted by the higher ups and asked to provide proof of the value of the car. We’ve got nothing to hide, isn’t value rather subjective anyway?

And the last order of business was to order up our new BUMFZLE license plates. The lady took our form and walked over to her computer. A minute later she came back and informed us that BUMFZLE was indeed available. Phew.

Tonight we went to our nephew’s t-ball game. There were two players who actually cared what was going on and really knew how to play. The other 25 six-year-olds seemed content to roll around in the dirt, build chalk mounds, and pull up grass. A perfectly stereotypical evening at the ball park.

may 21 2007 : st. paul
We’ve been chatting with the builders of our VW over the last week or so. Mainly discussing the interior and trying to determine the best way to go about kitting it out for the monstrous trip we’re planning for it. One of the dilemmas we’ve run in to is that with a double door panel van you essentially lose one wall of your interior space to a set of doors. Granted, you could just cover up the doors on one side, but that sort of defeats the purpose of the double door completely.

So today we get an email from the guys at the shop with a new proposition. They informed us that they were in the process of restoring yet another ’58 panelvan, this one without the double doors. The bodywork is basically done and it is set to hit the painters on June 1st. What they are proposing is that we switch buses. This bus would be finished to the same high standard as the other one, only we would get to chose paint, hardware, fabrics, everything ourselves. We’d be losing the cool factor of the double doors, but we’d get the opportunity to make a bus that is truly ours. We’ve pretty much decided to go ahead and do it. What this means is a nice slate blue paint job, a bunch more chrome, and safari windows. As for finishing the back, we’re still working on the setup of that.

may 27 2007 : st. paul
The last few days we’ve been at the lake home in Wisconsin. Ali’s dad put me to work and I spent a couple of days more or less as a tree trimming monkey. I’m still just limber and flexible enough to climb trees thirty feet in the air with an extend-a-chainsaw dangling another 20 feet over my head. It was actually sort of fun though, working with power tools, destroying things, building giant fires, driving tractors, all sorts of good guy stuff. We even built a new front porch on the kids giant playhouse.

Work on the VW is moving along as well. We’ve gotten a few pictures of the bus in the shop and we’ve been bouncing ideas back and forth about what the final product should look like, but so far we haven’t nailed a whole lot down for sure. The things we have agreed on are a bigger engine and some hard core suspension. We’re also thinking a larger gas tank wouldn’t be a bad idea. The guys at the shop have some cool ideas for some custom interior stuff and have even thrown in an ode to Pimp My Ride with a retractable flat screen television. It may not make the final cut, but we do like their enthusiasm for the project.

may 29 2007 : st. paul
We’ve gotten a lot of email lately asking us what it’s been like for us adjusting back to normal life. To be honest we don’t miss the boat life at all yet. Neither of us has mentioned it even once. It was an amazing adventure, but definitely not a lifestyle choice for us. We are always surprised when people tell us they plan to retire and spend the rest of their life on a boat. So far we have yet to meet anybody that actually looks like they might do that. Normal life doesn’t really seem to be suiting us though. We’re having fun doing all of life’s normal things, but the novelty is starting to wear off and we are itching for adventure again. The Great Race is coming up quick and we’re excited.